Reflections on 2012 and 2013's Word of the Year

Summer in Rome provided by Malinda Prud'homme

If you received my newsletter last year, you might remember that my themed word for the year was BALANCE.  I thought that by keeping this word at the forefront, my life would take on a stable path. Balance for me meant being able to be a mother, wife, teacher, friend, creative, and so on, and keep steadily on my feet.  I thought I'd be able to take a little of everything and be able to forge ahead with ease.

Those of you close to me know that I was actually knocked off-balance mid-year.  As I prepared to return to work in August, I found myself struggling with anxieties.  My son was particularly challenging behavior-wise this summer which caused quite a bit of stress for me.  But, beyond that, I found myself battling the public system for services that threatened to be diminished and cut altogether.  All this while I prepared to return to the classroom to care for a group of children I knew would need my full attention.

I teetered and tottered until I realized (and so did my doctor) that I could not do it all.  The scale was way heavier on one side and I needed to put the brakes on before everything fell right off.

So, I was taken off work for several months to get myself on track.  To reframe.  To rebalance.

As the end of the year approaches, and I reflect upon last year's word, I realize that I was not able to balance everything.  But, that's ok.  This word helped me to see that balancing might be for tight-rope walkers, but not for people in real life. I put too much on myself by selecting this word last year. 

There are times when we will do more of one thing than another.

There are times we will feel more of one thing than another.

And, there are times when the scale will be so off-balance, we will need to get right off and start stacking the scale all over again.

And, that will be just fine.  

As long as we recognize that we're tipping the scale or that we have resources available to us if we've fallen right off.

Then, we'll be just fine.

Some of the things I did in my time at home (besides caring for my son full-time) was reconnect with myself.  I did quite a bit of meditating - which not only helped me relax but also re-energize and dream more for my life.  I also did some journaling and blogging.  I found that sometimes I needed the quiet, private moments, but at times, I needed to get my voice out - even if only one other person read it.

In 2012, I embraced imperfection. This is a hard one for me, but I allowed things like craft projects to remain faulty (and I actually wore them that way!)  I also embraced time.  Afternoon teas while my little guy napped were so precious to me.

In 2012, I let go of the housework when I didn't feel like tackling it.  I let go of external pressures.  I felt no push to have to do this or that because I didn't have the pressure of having to prepare lunches and run off to work.  (Time off comes highly recommended by me, by the way!)

I discovered, in 2012, that I enjoy being home, I enjoy family time, and I enjoy learning about my son through him (not necessarily through books and articles). I learned that I want more of the above. 

This year, I thought I'd go about selecting the word of the year a little differently.  Last year, I chose what I wanted to focus on.

But, in a recent meditation, I asked the universe to reveal what I need to focus on for 2013.

And, the word that came up was TRUST. 

In fact, it's come up all over the place in recent weeks.  I've seen it highlighted in articles, in magazines, and in books. I've heard it spoken on television and in music videos and podcasts.  Each time, I think, "Ok!  I get it!  Trust it is!"

I'm not quite sure what this means, exactly.  Is it a trust of others, of myself, of the divine?  Of all three?  I have an entire year to have this revealed to me, so I'm not going to get myself out of balance to figure it all out right now.

As we say good-bye to the year that was, I trust that you will take some time yourself to find that focus word for the year.  If you already have it, I'd love to hear what it is and how you came upon it.  You can share below or send me an email if you'd like to keep it personal.

Happy New Year everyone.  I trust you shall visit again in 2013!